How I Became A Writer

Late 2007 was a time of something very exciting in the lives of me and my family,  early 2011 I struggled with an intense, terrifying depression because of the events of 2010,  which were very disturbing and distressing for me: because of a bad fall while working in my former restaurant in 2008, I fractured my tailbone and was put on painkillers, including OxyContin. I was deeply and painfully addicted by March 2010 and was taking handfuls of the 40 mg pills every day. On March 28, 2010, after a series of events which led me to having access to my pills mistakenly by my mother, who kept them locked up at her house–at my request–and I took 20 pills (40 mg), breaking 10 of them in half, so that I would get the drug faster. It took hours for the full effect to hit, since OxyContin is a long-lasting painkiller. About six hours after I put the 20 in my mouth, I was so out of it that I couldn’t even stay awake while sitting in a restaurant eating a meal and having a conversation with my Mom; she took pictures of me and I looked more stoned than I’ve ever seen a person look. I eventually OD’d and was unconscious for four days. I was very lucky that day. When I awoke, my husband wouldn’t talk to me and had refused to visit me in the hospital; I was devastated. He left me a voice-mail stating that he would have my friend watch the kids while I “went through rehab” or I would lose my kids. It was non-negotiable. He knew I had been working at getting off,  and that I had made a great deal of progress. I messed up once and he was very angry and it made things worse for me. He was not very understanding about abuse, he believed that people choose to be addicted, and he doesn’t feel addiction is an illness.

2010 was a real tough year. It seemed like everything I did was wrong and every decision I made was bad and horrible consequences always followed. It was literally one thing after another, like dominoes falling. My neighbors ended up thinking goodness knows what, and started treating me like a big-time illegal drug user. I was a complete mess. I did go through rehab, and by the time I started I had been weaning myself down off OxyContin for three months, completely on my own–as my Doctor (incredibly, the one who put me on OxyContin in the first place) refused to help me so I was forced to do it myself.  I felt as if I had thrown away all that hard work in one day by taking those 20 pills. I seriously needed a program. I entered MPI Treatment Center in Oakland, California, and it gave me a renewed sense of hope. But my addiction had gotten so intense that I couldn’t comfortably or sanely live sober. I remained sober, for the most part, for months after treatment–I didn’t touch OxyContin again but once a year later, and it didn’t help me.

After I had been off of opiates all together and was completely sober for over four months, first my Grandson was diagnosed with a brain tumor, which was absolutely devastating to his parents and our entire family. It literally happened while I was in treatment at MPI. Then, two months later, my husband’s brother passed away very suddenly of cirrhosis. It destroyed my husband; my husband had only two weeks before  moved back home after being gone for nearly six months. He moved back in without my okay while I was at Seattle Children’s Hospital with my stepdaughter and grandson in order to provide some emotional support and company, as the two of them were alone while her husband and other two children were back at home, in Alaska. I was not okay with it, and when his brother passed away, I really wasn’t okay with it; he was completely moody and crappy to me and I wasn’t sure why he even wanted to come back or why he wanted to still be with me.  I tried to be understanding about his loss but all he did was push me away and tell me everything I did was wrong. This  caused me to go into a terrible depression, and for the next few months all I did was drink alcohol and think about wanting to die…then several other very embarrassing events happened which only made things worse…  determination

It was August, 2010. Summer vacation ended, and my children started back to school.  I got very depressed because I was all alone at home… one day I decided to drink two bottles of red wine, and I got behind the wheel of my late-brother-in-law’s PT Cruiser and drove on the curvy road we lived on, getting into a serious wreck which involved a tree, the PT Cruiser, and me flying through the windshield right into that tree. I almost died that day. I was life-flighted to Sutter Memorial Hospital and had some serious injuries as well as a concussion, such as a badly broken neck, a gash in my head from the impact of hitting the tree, stitches on my forehead and right eye, abrasions and bruises all over my face; I also sustained some injuries which were permanent, including a nerve which was struck in my neck and caused me to have impaired vision, an eye that wouldn’t open for several months, and severe migraines. I was later diagnosed with Horner’s syndrome.

I truly tried to manage my excruciating pain with Tramadol. If you know anything about Tramadol, you know it’s worthless to someone in anything other than very minor pain. My pain was so bad that I had to be put back on Norco. I had been clean for over four months and that was down the tube instantly. I became so hooked again on Norco because of that accident that my addiction became much worse than I ever thought possible, and I had to hide it from my husband, which was incredibly difficult, especially since my prescriptions to it were cut-off just six weeks after my accident. I went into a deep, deep depression, and decided to write a book one day when I was sitting in front of my computer,  deep in thought about life, about the future, about what I wanted to do from that day forward. I wanted to make sure that people knew not only how incredibly bad OxyContin is for the human body, but how it’s the most addicting prescription drug of all time–possibly even  more addicting than heroin. I was on OxyContin for six weeks and I was already being prescribed the maximum dose and the effectiveness had decreased so much that I needed to increase it–(please, read my story, you’ll understand what I’m talking about). I felt at that time, and for several years afterward, that Oxycontin had ruined my life forever and that things would never get better. I wanted to die at so many points in time during that ordeal, and the depression became so unbearable that the Doctor couldn’t find an antidepressant which was effective, and I was literally left to deal with it myself. As I worked and worked on my book, it was the only thing I felt good about; it was the only thing I felt I wasn’t messing up.  Even the Attention Deficit Disorder I’ve struggled with for years was completely nonexistent when I was writing. Writing was my miracle…inspiration.writing4

But I was still using and it was taking everything out of me. Soon after, once I was so fed-up with how my life was going–I couldn’t remain sober and taking pills made me even more miserable but the withdrawals I got when I didn’t take them were unbearable–despite the stigma and negativity I received from some people in my life at the time, I made the difficult decision to enter a methadone treatment center and it has changed my life in many wonderful and positive ways. It helped me to realize the things in my life I needed to change, the relationships that were very destructive to me, and how I was on a destructive path in general and big changes need to be implemented. I have since made an abundance of changes in myself, and in my life, which allowed me to get back on track and develop some realistic goals, and I have exceeded my own expectations just by pushing myself. For one thing, since I got on methadone, I found other ways to deal with stress and painful memories or experiences–Emotional Freedom Technique, or EFT–also called Tapping–. has been extremely successful in getting rid of my depression and anxiety, and it’s completely safe. You tap on certain areas of your head and hands while repeating positive mantras in a certain order, and surprisingly it has worked wonders for me, and I now can go months without even needing to do the tapping. Plus, I get my feelings out better than I do with a therapist. So once I was completely clean (using methadone is a treatment, it is not the same thing as using drugs or taking pills, that is a major misconception, believe me) and one day, after writing in my book  for hours on end and realizing I had completed over 50,000 words and thirty full, typed pages, I sat there thinking about how much I get lost in my writing, and I always had. When I write, it’s as if nothing and no one is around me. I feel free, I feel complete, I feel whole. I don’t feel judged or criticized or inferior. When I write I’m on top of the worldi.love.writing.this.much

So I decided to become a Freelance Writer. I got a business license, designed and ordered some business cards, and got registered with elance.com and hubpages.com, where I developed a fantastic freelance writing portfolio and profile, wrote my first “hub” (my OxyContin article), and then started my first blog. I realized I loved blogging so much that I would start a second blog on controversial topics–I’m Libertarian and Agnostic–I don’t like being judged (though I’ve come a long way in my quest to stop caring what people think of me)–I felt if I all of a sudden began posting controversial stuff I might get some haters or even lose some followers. I came across Weebly, a free website and blog creation site, and I really liked their themes and how they were set up so I started my controversial blog on Weebly. It hasn’t done well at all, not enough people are seeing it..very little traffic has gone through it and I’m not sure why, but I’m going to start doing some marketing of it. Because it’s not getting traffic, I haven’t been posting on it as much as my other blogs. But I haven’t given up hope, I’m proud of that blog. It stands for something.

I started two blogs on Tumblr and one on Xanga, but i just don’t care too much for either of these sites and I have truly given them a try. Neither feels like a blog, it feels more like a social networking site, particularly on Tumblr; what are supposed to be their “blogs” are where you put your status update on social networking sites. I haven’t officially deleted the accounts yet because I heard some changes were being made. I also had a LiveJournal account, I definitely don’t like how that site is set up and how things work on it; the iPhone/iPad app is even worse. It also doesn’t have that blog feel to it–I eventually deleted my account. I love WordPress best; I also like my Blogger blogs; however, the way Google does things just rubs me the wrong way. They have to try to be different from everyone else–they don’t have “subscribers”, they have “Google+ Followers”, and if you don’t have a Google account–which isn’t just as simple as putting in your email and a password–you can’t be a Google+ Follower; there are other things about it I love, such as the “layout” feature of your blog; you can rearrange the “widgets” (“gadgets” on Blogger) by going to your layout page and moving things around, it’s extremely user-friendly. They also have some great themes. Nevertheless I have learned a great deal about how to set up a blog on many different platforms, and I have learned some HTML code which has come in quite handy. I am proficient in web design as well, and am working on my third website, my own, and will be finishing it up really soon–check back to jenniterrystockton.com in a couple of weeks 🙂

writing.feeling

This is my goal when I write, to make the reader feel as if they were actually experiencing my writing. That’s how passionate I am each time I write.

There is a lot more I can write than just blogs. I am a skilled and accomplished letter writer. I have been known to get what I want from companies because my letters are so well written; I was denied a Visa card once and wrote the company directly such a compelling two letters pleading my case that the New Account Manager handling my case personally called to let me know I had successfully changed her mind, and she raved about my letter writing–then sent me a Visa card. It was about a year ago, before I started doing any writing beyond my book, and you know what that approving Account Manager said? “Miss Jennifer, you ought to consider doing freelance writing, you have real talent”. That was all I needed to hear. She was the second person to say that to me within just a month, and it gave me just the confidence boost I needed to take things to the next level. I  also just wrote a very coercive letter of complaint to Microsoft Corporation in regard to Xbox Live and the account my 9 year-old son has with them; when I read my letter to my family they were literally clapping at the end. I threatened Microsoft with a journalism story for a newspaper (I was offered a job recently by a very large newspaper company in San Francisco; I told them I was a Columnist for that paper–technically I hadn’t turned the job down yet, so it could have happened….okay, white lie) if they didn’t take action on my letter. I can do excellent apology letters, as well as love and friendship letters; letters are just the beginning of my abilities. I can do executive/professional ghostwriting, copywriting, marketing letters (I have owned eight businesses and have been quite successful doing the writing of material for our newspaper ads, flyers, emails, etc),  resumes, college essays, research/research paper. People seem to respond well to my marketing material. I have always been good at writing; I rarely got below an A in high school or college–six years of college–on any of the many, many essays and research reports that I completed. I even started my senior thesis when I was in my first year of Graduate School.

This is a very witty and cute look at the "only 12 rules of writing you will ever need"

This is a very witty and cute look at the “only 12 rules of writing you will ever need”

Finally, I have one additional skill I’d like to share. I’m a master in the art of calligraphy. I started doing it when I was just nine years old, and I used to write letters in calligraphy on a regular basis. I’ve also done wedding invitations for many friends and family. I taught myself how to do calligraphy and you’d be quite surprised by my ability. There aren’t nearly as many people skilled in calligraphy as there are freelance writers in this country. I could write a fabulous love letter in calligraphy.

I really want to build my Freelance Writing business; I will work as hard as necessary and do whatever I need to in order to make this take off, I believe I have a lot of potential–and I survived a major painkiller overdose for a reason–I wasn’t done with what I was meant to do with my life–and I feel I’ve finally found my calling…If you have any writing needs at any time and would like to inquire about me doing a project for you, I’m ready–bring it on!

**I’m offering the following special: I will provide any writing you need done, absolutely free–if you’re a company, all I ask is that I be given the opportunity to do several projects, letters, marketing, whatever the need may be. I will be able to use that as a reference for future clients, it will give me experience, and I’m more than happy to do it for free just to get the experience and some good word of mouth.

Please, fill out the form below, or email me at perfectlyworded@gmail.com…thank you so much for taking the time to read the story of how I became a freelance writer, I hope you’ll tell your friends to visit my site and if  you know anyone with writing needs, let them know it’s completely FREE.

Thanks for visiting my page!

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